Writings

 

Living With Everlasting Memories

I went through this unfortunate tragedy and trauma on December 23, 2006. It was Saturday and I was asleep, when I heard a frantic voice of my servant followed by a knock on the door, ‘Sir please get up, there is a phone call from the Foreign Office’ (my father was working at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs in Islamabad, Pakistan). When I picked up the phone, it was my father’s assistant who told me to rush to the Services Hospital as my father had a severe heart attack. I was all alone at home with my servant as my mother had gone to Lahore (a city almost four hours drive from Islamabad), I drove my car at fast as I could to reach hospital. I met a lot of my father’s colleagues at the hospital, while doctors were trying their best to save life inside the emergency operation theatre. I was literally feeling numb all over, thinking about my father, my sister and of course about my mother who was traveling out of city. I could not even gather much courage to ask my father’s colleagues about his condition. Finally I took a deep breadth and asked one of my father’s old friend and colleague about his condition. He hugged me and said, ‘do you see that stretcher in the corridor, that’s your father’, my son he just expired’. I could not believe my ears, my father was the most energetic man on the planet, he was physically fit, working day and night and traveling half the month with head of the states and attending to the visiting dignitaries, he was just 61 and I do not recall even a single incident where he had to go to the hospital as he was in great shape.

I am a very emotional person and now I had to be strong and I distinctly remember that I suddenly got some sort of super power and patience as I did not even shed a single tear. I started calling my relatives and then I was not sure how to reveal this tragedy to my mother and of course my only sibling (my sister, who was married few years ago and was supposed to visit our place on Saturday evening along with my niece and nephew). After informing couple of close relatives, I finally called my mother and sister and informed about our father’s death. On hearing this news, my mother literally collapsed and fainted and I could hear my sister burst into tears. It was simply unbelievable for everyone as nobody could even reconcile with this shocking news. He was a true family man; I distinctly recall he would regret his official banquets to spend time with us. He was a pillar of strength for lots of friends and especially for our extended family. He left great examples for many in our family in terms of his selfless acts.

When I reached home along with father’s dead body in the ambulance, I saw the Foreign Minister sitting in the lawn and he hugged me and I suddenly came out of numbness, realized my father had died and I started crying. My mother flew and reached back home and so did other relatives and my sister. It was a horrible scene and I still feel that it’s unreal. It’s been almost few months over two years and I have not been able to come to terms with this tragedy. This is unthinkable. I think I will never be able to reconcile with this in my life time as he is still alive and I feel his presence every moment.

The funeral was led by the Foreign Secretary and scores of people kept coming to our place for condolences. I still recall, there were lots of beautiful wreaths from his friends from Army, Foreign Office and even from President as well. I distinctly remember that Maulvi Sahab (religious cleric who led the funeral prayers) said at the graveyards that ‘I do not know this man but the huge number of people attended the funeral and what I have heard from people around is incredible and he must have been blessed by God in Heavens’. It was a great honor as Prime Minister personally came to our place for condolence. He paid rich tributes and remembered my father in beautiful words. There was a special reference at the Foreign Office and my father was remembered in great words and I really felt honored to be his son. After his death, I started receiving condolences from literally across the globe from our Embassies abroad. I made it a point to reply back to all condolences with note of thanks on behalf of my family for their support and remembering us in such difficult times. I have made a special folder of all those condolences.

I still recall my father as handsome and energetic man who was committed with his work. After a span of one week I got a call from the Foreign Office and I was asked to visit my late father’s office to sort out personal stuff. It was such a painful moment as it took me almost three hours to sort out official and personal belongings of my father. There I discovered that I did not know a lot about my father. There were some very special aspects of my father that were not known to me. There is a rule that whenever you get a gift on your foreign visit or from any visiting foreign dignitary, since you are getting that gift in official capacity, you are supposed to get it evaluated form one of the Government’s ministry and in case the gift is above pre-defined threshold in terms of value then you have to pay some percentage to retain it otherwise you will deposit it with Government. My father followed this rule religiously and it speaks a lot about his ethics and honesty.

 

My father had a yearly planner and I was astonished to see his organization at work. He had a very hectic routine and he was traveling a lot but even then I saw notes on his planner such as ‘Call Hadeel (one of our uncle’s daughter) for regrets for attending marriage function’. I was told by my father’s assistants at the office that he used to regularly distribute his official gifts amongst his office staff and they loved his gesture. It was such a beautiful feeling to see my father had maintained separate folders in his personal cabinet about certificates of my sister and myself.

There are a lot of other worth mentioning memories that are now extremely precious to me. My father was very fortunate as I used to hear great things about him during his life time because of his impeccable reputation and it’s still the same.

For instance once I remember, one of my friends saw my father scolding the General Manager of a local hotel in Islamabad in a lobby. When I came to know about it, I asked my father and he responded back with distress, telling me that there was some high profile delegation and the General Manager had really messed up the schedule and arrangements. Also, he mentioned something which was beautiful ‘Son I can sort out people with ease on wrong doings and whenever I come across inefficacies in work as I was never obliged in life’.

Once I was visiting abroad on my business trip to Bangkok, Thailand and my father arranged a driver and car at the airport to drop me at the hotel. For this, he obviously called Pakistani embassy in Bangkok. I called the gentleman at the embassy twice for thanks for this gesture, once I got dropped at the hotel and also when I was departing back to Islamabad, Pakistan. The gentleman at our Pakistani embassy in Bangkok wrote a letter back to my father praising me for my mannerisms. I remember, my father came back from office extremely happy and said ‘Read this letter son, I am really proud of you’. There was extreme happiness on his face. I saw the same letter filed in the personal cabinet in personal folder that my father had maintained in his office. I found it when I was sorting out personal stuff in his office after his death. I now realize, how happy he would have been and it was his extreme passion for me and that letter of appreciation was of such value to him that he made it a point to file it in a folder as something very special.       

Once I bought blue and white striped tie for my father and asked him to wear when he goes to the Oval Office as he was visiting USA as a state guest with Pakistani delegation. I mentioned this very casually. But I still recall distinctly that I was sitting with my mother watching television, tuned to the news channel and I noticed that he was wearing the same tie. Now whenever I see that tie in my cupboard I am reminded of my father and of course with tears in my eyes. Its shear love and beautiful gesture that he took a mental note of my wish and remembered it despite his extremely hectic schedule. 

He retired after serving almost thirty one years in Army in January 2000. I remember he was a bit depressed at that day as he had retired as he was obsessed with his profession. In his last days, prior to his retirement from Army, he was a bit worried since he was looking for a new job as he wanted to keep himself busy and of course because he was the sole bread earner as well. On his day of retirement, we were having tea in our lounge and I recall that he mentioned to us ‘Today I was asked by my boss (very senior ranking official); please let me know if I could do anything for you. And I just said good wishes and thanked him for his guidance and prayers’. I really appreciated his respectful answer to his boss as it said a lot about him as a person. My father was appointed at the Foreign Office within a month time after his retirement without him applying for that particular job. He earned a great reputation and respect which is beyond anyone’s comprehension. He was a thorough gentleman and always lived a very respectful life.   

Once I was having discussion with my father on various professions. Apart from many valuable comments, he mentioned something that I still remember when he said that one could earn money easily with brains and good luck but it takes ages to earn a good reputation whereby you are respected as an honorable and credible person. 

My father lived a very eventful and humble life. A lot of people know and have seen him on television, in newspapers, with high profile dignitaries and head of the states but he lived a very humble life. Even today when I go to some market a shopkeeper would remember him as a cheerful man, a butcher in one of the meet shop cherish times he spent while having tea with him in early mornings on Sundays at the shop, the chef and waiters at the Islamabad Club still recall my fathers personal touch with them as he always enquired about their families, the baggage handlers at the Airport have lots of respect for my father and of course my fathers staff at the Foreign Office who are still in touch with me and remember my father in great words as a great individual, a real mentor and competent professional. And the list goes on.  

Now he is no more, but wherever I go I hear beautiful stories about him as a person and people have high expectations from me as he had set great traditions.

I miss him almost every day and of course on a lot of occasions e.g. on my birthdays, the day I got promoted, on family reunions, on my marriage ceremony etc. But I am really proud to be his son as I get respect wherever I go and I have everlasting memories to cherish.     

My father breadth his last on Saturday, December 23, 2006 in the early hours and just a week earlier on Friday December 15, 2006 he performed Umrah and called me from Makkah after jumma prayers telling me that he offered a lot of prayers. He was a fortunate man since Allah granted him with an opportunity to visit Kabbah few days prior to his death. God bless his beautiful soul in eternal peace.   

My father is my role model and I always pray to God to give me courage and strength to become a good human being just like him. He was truly a great professional, humble, selfless and honest man, a father one would dream for, a good son, a true friend which is hard to find in today’s times, inspiration for the family and my mother remember him as her best friend and their relationship was filled with lots of love and beautiful gestures.

His unconditional love and caring nature was out of this world and I have seen very few like him.  

He was truly my hero.

Change is Inevitable & Yes We Pakistani’s have a lot to Offer….

Change is Inevitable & Yes We Pakistani’s have a lot to Offer….

Robert Gallagher said that change is inevitable - except from a vending machine. It is inevitable that structures and processes and relationships will change in our day-to-day lives. It is inevitable that we will face new challenges and it is inevitable that things may seem a little different in the years ahead. Yes, life is definitely going to become a little "shaken up and stirred".

But as we look back on a journey - a journey that started out with hesitant, tentative steps, in retrospect, we see just how far we have progressed. I would like to share a memory - memory that serve to illustrate that while some things will change and rightly so - the core fundamentals in our lives will remain the same.

This brief illustration is about a sports event in a school with parents invited as well. A youngster is sitting next to the sports field trying to put on his sock. The sports teacher walked past. The boy stands up, hopping around on one leg, his sock in his hand and he greets, "Sir" He sits down again intent on putting on his sock. The teacher walks on a little way and watch. The youngster it seems has chosen a bad spot. At least six other parents happen to walk past him, separately, but in relatively quick succession. And, every time, without fail, he clambers on to his one foot and greets, "Sir or Ma'am!" I'm not sure if he eventually did get his elusive sock on - but I can testify to the exceptional manners that were witnessed - manners that are so firmly ingrained that they are almost intuitive.

This phenomenon of ‘change’ is visibly coming up in the form of extreme ‘competitiveness’. The world is becoming very competitive in every sense. Let’s take golfing and tennis, aspiring players graduating from academies with stringent intake criterion and undergo untiring trainings.

There is astounding research going on in the fields of Engineering and Medicine. The advancements in the area of Telecommunications are beyond ones comprehension. The desktop machines are become outdated with laptops becoming common at affordable prices. In academia, now we get to hear of close to perfect scores in exams such as GMAT and GRE and intake of top schools are becoming stringent. In the field of defense there is sophisticated weaponry with unmanned air craft’s offering high precision and accuracy and GPS technologies literally offering street views at few clicks of any part of the world. And the list goes on. These are all few examples of how world are evolving and are becoming very scientific.

Now given this backdrop that change is inevitable and it is the most constant thing in this world, let’s see what we have to offer as a Pakistani as we have to be on our toes to meet the demands of the ever changing paradigms of this world.

We are living in difficult times and unfortunately our beloved Pakistan has few threats. We all have to face the current turmoil with brave hearts. I am a firm believer that we the Pakistani’s are one of the most talented nations in the world.

"If we did the things we are capable of, we would astound ourselves." ~Thomas Edison

"All our dreams can come true - if we have the courage to pursue them." ~Walt Disney

Although the list of great Pakistani’s is never ending but I would like to take this opportunity and share few names who made all of us proud.

• Jahangir Khan the greatest player of all times made history in the game of squash. He won world open record six times and won the coveted British Open ten times. He also had an honor of being unbeaten for record 5 years, a record breaking winning streak in the history of squash. I am not sure how many of you know that Jahangir underwent multiple surgeries as a child and was advised strictly by doctors to avoid any physical exertion as he was extremely week.

• Wasim Akram the great cricketer made it to hall of fame as he holds the record for the most number of wickets in one day cricket (502) which is no mean feat.

• Cadet Ghulam M. Malik (retired as Lt. Gen G.M Malik) is the first Asian to win the prestigious Queens Medal at Royal Military Academy at Sandhurst in UK.

• The gifted Junior Under Officer Uqbah Hadeed Malik (Now Capt) merely at the age of 22, wins the coveted sword of honor at the Royal Military Academy at Sandhurst in UK as he was declared as the best overall international cadet.

• 18 year old Ali Moeen Nawazish, a wiz kid from Rawalpindi made a world record by securing 22 A’s in A level examinations of University of Cambridge. He is also acknowledged by the Guinness Book of Records at this tender age for outstanding achievement.

• Dr. Atique Samdani awarded ‘physician of the year’ award in USA.

• The world's youngest Microsoft Certified Professional is a Pakistani

There was one common denominator amongst all of them, they all had an extra-ordinary ‘will’ do to do well in their respective areas and they were extremely focused in their pursuits. And surely they were able to adapt to the best of their abilities to the ‘change’ in pursuit of their goals. The above are few examples of Pakistani’s who have outshined other nations which suggest the talent which we all can leverage provided we have the ‘will’ and right ‘intentions.’

And then there are other phenomenal achievements of recent times in the field of Telecommunications and biometrics databases:

• There were 300,000 mobile users in Pakistan in year 2000 and within a span of few years the number stands at around 98 million mobile users.

• Pakistan is the most connected country in South Asia, with the highest teledensity in terms of mobile access per hundred people which stands at 62%

• Pakistan has the world's largest biometric database (NADRA); this system (not the data) is now being provided to allied countries

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. ~Eleanor Roosevelt

The following extract from a speech by Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling who spoke to Harvard graduates on June 5, 2008 offers a very unique perspective when he says…

“If you choose to use your status and influence to raise your voice on behalf of those who have no voice; if you choose to identify not only with the powerful, but with the powerless; if you retain the ability to imagine yourself into the lives of those who do not have your advantages, then it will not only be your proud families who celebrate your existence, but thousands and millions of people whose reality you have helped change. We do not need magic to change the world; we carry all the power we need inside ourselves already: we have the power to imagine better”

And our great founder of the nation Muhammad Ali Jinnah rightly points out…

‘With faith, discipline and selfless devotion to duty, there is nothing worthwhile that you cannot achieve’.

The greatest example of a man who really brought an extra ordinary change for the generations to come can be attributed to our beloved Quaid Muhammad Ali Jinnah, when somebody very rightly points out….

"The change in the world is always brought by one man, whom we call "the leader". Who has the vision and the force not only to make people dream, but to reach and live that dream. He is intelligent enough to foresee tomorrow. He is selfless and courageous to the extent of being ready to scarifies everything and express truth even if it defames him. People fellow him where he takes them. He is the one who accelerates history and for whom nature proclaims itself. "What a man""

God bless Pakistan

Sheikh Taimur Nawaz